I always wonder If I am really brave enough. Putting myself out there to make it work. How will they know about your product if you are not willing to do it? With all those obstacles coming your way- this should not be a problem. This part supposed to be easy and fun. Don’t sit on it, Do it.
Sunday, January 31, 2021
Saturday, January 30, 2021
Grateful
I am sitting here, in my childhood room, and smiling. The smile that makes my eyes shine. Nothing in the outside world is calling me. I have everything I need here. All the tools to make my designs come to life, develop my skills and push my boundaries. Sometimes I feel I am so in my head that I "miss" something but most of the time I am grateful. Having that gift, where being alone is not a bad thing.
Friday, January 29, 2021
Try a different approach.
I didn’t want to be my own manufacture. I wanted someone else to take that mission. I wanted to focus on design and marketing. A year passed by, more than 40 "no"s and 10 failed attempts- I know there is no other choice. Take a step back, start by selling one piece and figure it out throughout your journey. You tried, you saw it's not working? Try a different approach.
Thursday, January 28, 2021
Worth the money
Another day. Another mistake that cost me money, affected my daily routine, productivity, and energy. Maybe instead of trying to avoid mistakes, acknowledge you will make them. The question is what the alternative is. You don’t want to make mistakes and lose money? Go back to being an employee. Knowing where I am today, what I have accomplished, who I have become- Definitely worth the money. Keep going.
Wednesday, January 27, 2021
Choose you first
It gets lonely. No doubt. Do you want to pick up the phone talking about random things while looking at your endless list of tasks? Does it fill your cup? Or them? Can I even think about it that way before I make the call? Remember, It has nothing to do with care and empathy. Nothing to do with you being a good friend. It is knowing no matter what, you need to choose you first.
Tuesday, January 26, 2021
One day.
I always wonder what is the catch here. When will I know why no one has ever tried to do it before. I am looking at research articles proving the benefits of using laser cut in fabrics. Books who point out that computer pattern making programs were invented in 1964. And yet, we are still here. Cutting patterns with paper and learning the old computer program when there are at least 20 new versions. Hoping one day I will know how to answer those questions.
Monday, January 25, 2021
You will learn
Money needed to be spent on the right and necessary things and you will probably see me lying in bed, watching the ceiling and breathing as if I just ran a marathon. I try to make my pros and cons list inside my head, thinking about all the things happening in the world, trying to return my heartbeat to its normal pace. One day I will learn how to control that feeling because building a business will not be possible otherwise.
Sunday, January 24, 2021
It will never be the same
Sometimes I feel like I am hiding my ideas. Being scared it will be stolen. I know it’s holding me back for no reason. Share it. Tell them exactly what your plans are because the journey to get there is so hard- It makes it unrealistic they will follow. And even if they do, it will never be the same.
Saturday, January 23, 2021
The end result
Every morning when I get up in my morning I have that feeling. It's an understanding of what I do mixed with how old I am. It is me realizing I am working on something without knowing if it will succeed and when. This is not a children's game, I know it. I also know worrying about the end result, is not "me". Because life was never been better. And I also know that.
Friday, January 22, 2021
Time
Being picky about what I spend my time on- is new for me. I used to always think about the other side. The friend in front of me, the one who needs someone to listen. Even if I knew it would affect me later. Now I know better. Saying "no" doesn’t mean I am a bad person. Saying "no" is ok if you know it will "cost" you. Cost you with your energy, emotions, and thoughts. The things we need to protect the most.
Thursday, January 21, 2021
Be present
There are days when I keep thinking about a sentence, about a feeling that doesn't find her way out from my brain. It is there consuming my energy and focus from the things that truly matter. There are days when I can stop it in 5 minutes and there are days when it's stuck inside my head. I feel it in my body, my brain, my thoughts, my emotions- and it stays there. One day I will know how to control it but in the meantime remember, there is nothing we can do with our past. Be present. Now is always a good time to start.
Wednesday, January 20, 2021
Those are the things we need to appreciate
School was never hard for me. I even remember I used to do my homework on breaks since it wasn’t a big deal. but I never considered myself smart. All this time I thought smart was a title given to doctors, pilots, or lawyers. Now I know better. The smart ones are those who push forward when things get hard, when no one handed you a road map, when you are constantly looking for ways to get better. And those are the things we need to appreciate.
Tuesday, January 19, 2021
Sending you the best of me
I always think once my website will be out there- I will immediately get many orders. I know the right people would love it. Not because I made it, no because it's been a long journey until I got here but because you never seen something like this before. But maybe starting small. Thinking about selling one shirt a day is a good mindset at the moment. Knowing the end goal is sending you the best of me.
Monday, January 18, 2021
Will you keep pushing
I have plenty to do. From perfecting my computer skills to learning different sewing techniques. There are endless resources out there and I can always do more, learn to be better. But I am mad. Mad that I can't go to work, that my plans are not going as planned, that the world is upside down. Remember, no one is asking you, how do you wish it would be. It is moving. The question is, will you keep up. Keep pushing. Even though it doesn't go as planned.
Sunday, January 17, 2021
One day closer
I am dreaming about a well-organized schedule, a high-quality manufacture, reliable guidance, and paying customers. A motivated team with great communication and professional skills. I dream about routine. About developing my own skills. Devoting my time to a specific type of work. Even though hard days will come, remember you are always one day closer.
Saturday, January 16, 2021
Excuses
It's lonely. And sometimes I feel like I need it. The togetherness. Not the movie love story, not luxurious holidays or expensive gifts. Just kindness and care. But I am stuck. Knowing I need to act in order to make things happen. Waiting is not going to solve it. Acting is. And all the rest will follow. You know most of them are excuses anyway.
Friday, January 15, 2021
It's your biggest asset
Sometimes I feel like being laser focus all the time has its toll on me. There are moments you don’t need to be 100% percent but most of the time I find myself digging inside my brain to find what I was looking for. What I wanted to say, to write, to design. It's your biggest asset lady, it is the reason why you are here right now- doing the things you never believed you can. And better.
Thursday, January 14, 2021
Now you have proof
It's been I week since the last day I was able to go to work. I miss it but it's amazing what a well-prepared schedule in advance does to your brain. The location has changed, but the routine remains the same. I keep telling myself, no matter where you are, no matter what happens, no one can take it away from you. Now you have proof.
Wednesday, January 13, 2021
Notes FOMO
I was going through my notes. Notes I have been writing since I started this journey. The journey of trying to make my dreams a reality. I always feel like if it's not there, in front of my eyes- Something will go wrong. I would lose track of what's important. I get notes FOMO. Not a note or any word of wisdom missing from the wall will make you lose track of what you know by heart. Remember.
Tuesday, January 12, 2021
Moving on
When they hear about my journey they can't help but wonder. And I often think about it later. Instead of focusing on the things that truly matter. The purpose accomplished, the connection, the nice gesture of kindness. Being comfortable with your choices is not thinking about it afterward. It is moving on to the next thing.
Monday, January 11, 2021
Consistency
Be consistent. You can hear it everywhere. A year ago I started answering questions about fashion online. No one read it at the beginning, but I decided I will answer two questions every single day. Today it's a different story. The hard part is being consistent at the beginning, showing up even if it seems like no one cares. I already have proof consistency works, so make sure you don’t stop at the beginning. No matter what.
Sunday, January 10, 2021
It's a good thing. Not a bad one.
Sometimes it feels like I haven’t even started yet. The "wall of wisdom" hanging in front of my eyes shows me I have learned, achieved, and changed but sometimes I feel like I can do more, do better, be better. There will always be new things to learn, new habits to adopt, new ways to follow. It's a good thing. Not a bad one. Remember.
Saturday, January 9, 2021
It’s a big step forward
One step ahead in this unfamiliar world and I am pleased. I keep telling myself it is not for likes, views, or compliments. This is for me. Stepping out from my comfort zone to this “intimidating” zone. It’s a big step forward. A big one. Keep going.
Friday, January 8, 2021
It wasn’t wasted. It was meaningful.
I am at home. That's our third lockdown and I am back at my childhood table. The wall of information is getting tight and I feel proud. This year wasn't easy for anyone but the effort was made, and progress was accomplished. Looking back I will forever know it wasn’t wasted. It was meaningful.
Thursday, January 7, 2021
Everything I have ever wanted.
I am at eating my salad, looking at the mannequin wearing a top I have made today- and smile. I had an idea this morning and now I am looking at it. It's quiet and I have everything I have ever wanted. For now. Happy birthday to me.
Wednesday, January 6, 2021
Because every day is your birthday.
It’s not my bank account, not my current relationship status, nor the car I am driving in. It's not where I thought I will be when I turn 35 years old. It is me trying to be better than I was yesterday. Because every day is your birthday.
Tuesday, January 5, 2021
It's all a fog.
Will you do it even if someone told you-You can't? Would you take this path even if you can't tell where it's going to take you?. It's all a fog. You drive to work, and you can barely see the car in front of you. But eventually, I believe you will get there- even if you can't see clearly where you are going.
Monday, January 4, 2021
From the comfort zone to the courage zone
I have tried to do it today. Take some pictures of myself wearing
my designs. I had so many reasons why I shouldn't do it, why I can wait for
tomorrow- but I got dressed. I looked in the mirror and was ready to postpone
it for tomorrow. But I stood there, taking pictures. Once I had one "good" picture, I felt I can pull it off. Move from the comfort zone to the courage zone. And now is a good time to start.
Sunday, January 3, 2021
Saturday, January 2, 2021
Maybe not today, but you will regret it one day.
They said I am a runner. They said it has nothing to do with what I saw in my childhood or my current job. I am a runner. Life now is exactly how I wanted them to be, thinking opening my heart will make it all go away. What if it will get better?. Maybe not today, but you will regret it one day.
Friday, January 1, 2021
Doesn’t count
I started with an excel sheet. Some points. Some guidelines but stating will be when I actually do it. Share a picture. An idea I am working on. All the backstage work I love so much like printing sheets and perfect my schedule doesn’t count. Remember that.
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